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this girl at uni was dressed sooo gay and then i found out she's just straight with a lesbian mom. dykebaiting is not a victimless crime 😔
date her mom ?
date her mom
“this is the hill you want to die on?” oh no i just love arguing. i fully intend to leave this hill once it gets boring. sorry for the confusion!
her favorite lipstick
babe are you ok you reblogged eunnieboo’s “her favorite lipstick” again
Another fun thing I do with customers - specifically parents of very small children who don’t know they’re alive yet - is directly imply I think the coffee is for the baby, not the parent. and lemme tell you, like 70% of parents eat that shit up. They immediately go along with the bit and start discussing it with their newborn child, while the baby just stares at us like 😮











